In my time of being alive I have found little rhyme, little time
I have found in time that my hands cannot clench time nor even hold it for even a glimpse of time
I have found in my hands a trouble of jealousy and greediness to plunder lands that barely stand to withstand life
In life I have found a terrible ache that shakes the whole earth under one earthquake
I try and move one step to be knocked back four with doors closing and the one that is supposed to open and reveal a new and generous alternative stuck. As if with no luck to pluck me out of which I am stuck
That as if everything that I undertake, undertook, is tied and twisted in all crookedness which binds me in desperation and frustration
I have found in this distression my current and past obsessions. . .
I have found in all frustration and subordination still and unfulfilled soul
Deep in me is a person that wishes to be but cannot be
Evil and religiously at peace, both still frighten me
Because even in them who am I, and as time flies and I cannot grasp I have to ask will I ever! Be content with me
If there is a me
All that time had taught me and the world has bought for me and friends and boys have sought and thought for me to be is really and can’t be what I truly desire all to be
For life and time and death seem all as if one kind
Because death is life and time is death and life is time and time is death
For what breath do I give and for who do I breathe and is the breath, my breath even—worth it?
In my time I have found little rhyme and little time
But have I not found God?
God who is time and is rhyme . . . and life and death . . . should I not be content?
Wednesday, October 6, 2010
Monday, October 4, 2010
Lost and Dying (Still in Progress)
I had a friend once who was sweeter than any person that I'd ever known. He was quiet in a way that was bit abnormal, or at least at the time it seemed that way. But eventually, me and this other girl got him to talk more and more, and with each day he began to open up more and more. I don't know . . . It's something that just won't leave me . . . I've lost many friends as is understandable in life . . . but he I cannot forget. Because it, it seems so sinister . . . Something that sends chills down my spine. He was a quiet boy as I relayed earlier. Clean cut, with his hair to the side and glasses, neat clothes . . . I don't know what it is but the image is like engraved in my mind and I remember. Sometimes I wonder if anybody else remembers. If anybody sees what I see.
As I, and my friend were opening him up, so were other children. Telling him to do this with his hair, and that with his glasses, and this with his clothes . . . Thing is, is that in a year he was unrecognizable . . . He was completely transformed. He was no longer himself, no longer innocence.
Later, two years or so, same children telling him to do this and that led him off the path and on to their crooked ones. He struggles with drugs today, sexuality and other issues. Same as other friends of mine, but . . . I don't know, he just stays in my mind . . .
I have another friend. One that is very dear to my heart. I've never really cared for anyone. I don't even care for myself. Or maybe it's just that my emotions I never let myself feel, and therefore I am unaware of their existence. But she to was one of the sweetest people I had ever known. But it seems this world, neglect, and time has turned her into a lost soul more desolate than those almost in third world countries similar to my other friend . . . I see her everyday . . . But somehow I have lost the will or the desire to speak up. The voice that I speak without delay in other situations but with her it seems lost in my throat, my thoughts. She has not a father that pays her attention, so she searches for it among boys. She has nothing to go home to, so she stays out all night. And she has anger that was never dealt with, so she spurs out perverse language gaining her the reputation of a hoe. Only thing is, is that this title that hangs about her head she does not see . . . Only others . . .
But I see her everyday.
Time . . . Lost . . . Souls . . . My friends. But how many others are there. And those who seem to have it together, even they in their own worlds hold struggles unseen and unwanted. But when we see them, why is it that we turn our head and look in the other direction. Talk about them when their gone and say muffled, 'I pray for her . . . him'
As I, and my friend were opening him up, so were other children. Telling him to do this with his hair, and that with his glasses, and this with his clothes . . . Thing is, is that in a year he was unrecognizable . . . He was completely transformed. He was no longer himself, no longer innocence.
Later, two years or so, same children telling him to do this and that led him off the path and on to their crooked ones. He struggles with drugs today, sexuality and other issues. Same as other friends of mine, but . . . I don't know, he just stays in my mind . . .
I have another friend. One that is very dear to my heart. I've never really cared for anyone. I don't even care for myself. Or maybe it's just that my emotions I never let myself feel, and therefore I am unaware of their existence. But she to was one of the sweetest people I had ever known. But it seems this world, neglect, and time has turned her into a lost soul more desolate than those almost in third world countries similar to my other friend . . . I see her everyday . . . But somehow I have lost the will or the desire to speak up. The voice that I speak without delay in other situations but with her it seems lost in my throat, my thoughts. She has not a father that pays her attention, so she searches for it among boys. She has nothing to go home to, so she stays out all night. And she has anger that was never dealt with, so she spurs out perverse language gaining her the reputation of a hoe. Only thing is, is that this title that hangs about her head she does not see . . . Only others . . .
But I see her everyday.
Time . . . Lost . . . Souls . . . My friends. But how many others are there. And those who seem to have it together, even they in their own worlds hold struggles unseen and unwanted. But when we see them, why is it that we turn our head and look in the other direction. Talk about them when their gone and say muffled, 'I pray for her . . . him'
'If everyone cared and nobody cried, if everyone loved and nobody lied, if everyone shared and swallowed their pride, then we'd see the day when nobody died . . .' Nickelback
Monday, September 27, 2010
Michelle Obama
From the mouths and pens of the founding fathers, America is built on the principle and core belief that all men are created equal. This American value has not always been demonstrated in the course of this country's history and many times has seemed a struggle to obtain what seems all to simple. Recently this idea has reached the forefront of many discussions, though many have tried to be avoided as it was with the discussions of slavery in 1790, with the first African American couple to reside in the White House with the authority and title of the President and First Lady. Michelle Obama more prominently, being the descendant of slaves, has caused this revisit, and through this has helped move America to reassess and accept the principle in which the country was built.
America has been referred to as the Great Melting Pot, in which people of all races and cultures have come together in the idea of obtaining the American dream. If there was a picture or an artwork that when looked at you immediately connected its representation, then Michelle Obama would be the complete image of America. At Whitney M. Young Magnet School, Obama displayed her very social and diverse character amongst students of all colors, race, and cultural backgrounds, being recalled as being able to “float gracefully” between social groups in the school.”(Mundy 55) Her overall ability to relate to all students who went to her school not only positioned her strategically for her future but also set her up for her most destined position, being the First Lady of the United States of America. She was and is, also and most importantly, a voice when she chose to speak, an odd trait among women but presently is the overall admiration of a strong woman. Marian Robinson, Michelle's mother, made note that, “Michelle's always been very vocal about anything . . . If it's not right, she's going to say so,” (Mundy 56) a characteristic that has followed her to the White House adding to America a stronger sense of equality by on a public and national setting endorsing and promoting that women are a voice equal to men; fulfilling the principle that all men are created equal.
It is said that behind every great man there is a strong woman; with Barack Obama, Michelle Obama is the aid and fire as well as the strength behind Obama as it was designed but at it's peak of functionality. Mundy analyzes in her biography of Michelle, that “If Michelle was intense and driven, Barack soon emerged as more intense and more driven, at least when it came to making a mark in politics.” (Mundy 123) An intensity that has benefited America not only in the rigorous production since the inauguration of Obama, but most importantly the care of the American people, primarily the middle and lower classes, gradually dispersing the inequality of the more wealthier classes versus the lower classes. Michelle Obama's advocacy, that has followed her since her days at Princeton, where she involved herself in the Third World Center that supported minority kids and Harvard, where she participated in advocating the hiring of professors of minorities, for those less fortunate has been clearly visible in the days in office of the Obama administration with the proposal of a public option, and her visits to homeless shelters and soup kitchens in her first days of being the First Lady. This focus on those struggling has initiated a national discussion and look at how we treat those people who are less fortunate, sometimes showing a darker side of our democracy. Such as on a news report on MSNBC where a business man was seen throwing money at a man who could not walk at a healthcare protest. This concern for the less fortunate is many times misinterpreted for a communistic impulse on democracy.
The lasting legacy of Michelle Obama will probably be the example of what an African American woman is capable of and the deterioration of the 'Sista Gurl' stereotype that has clung to black women. She has also brought to the eye nationally, that black women are pretty and more importantly bringing a sense of pride to many African American women and more so African American young girls who are constantly faced everyday with the white skin and long hair as a sense of beauty. Bringing black women finally, as somewhat of the last people to acquire equality in the American culture. Presently she is also the representation of fashion as Mrs. Kennedy in her day and time was, and the representation of discipline as Barbara Bush was. Consequently as with every First Lady she is the female role model impacting America not only on its fashion but on American women and young girls and their conduct. Michelle Obama again is the discussion and the positive progress of America's long racial history, as Mundy perfectly puts it, “. . . her very presence at Obama's side as the descendant of slaves . . . [has raised] questions about how far we have come in our tolerance and how far we have to go . . . [her] journey will have a more lasting impact on our dreams of equality, our hopes and our audacity . . .” (Mundy 198)
Michelle Obama, the descendant of slaves, has caused the revisit of race and has moved America not only to reassess but to accept the principle on which the country was built. The first time you look upon a picture your eyes divert to a certain point and usually your memory remembers this first impression, an impression that will stick and will be inevitably hard to remove. Michelle Obama is the image of America in its purest form that when looked at resembles the principles of sovereignty, freedom, but most importantly equality by her skin tone and her gender that reside in the highest form of authority in the United States. She is the success of the struggles of men and women, and leaders and politicians, and slaves who have gone before her and carved out the path to the fulfillment of the words that were written in the Declaration of Independence, 'that all men are created equal.'
America has been referred to as the Great Melting Pot, in which people of all races and cultures have come together in the idea of obtaining the American dream. If there was a picture or an artwork that when looked at you immediately connected its representation, then Michelle Obama would be the complete image of America. At Whitney M. Young Magnet School, Obama displayed her very social and diverse character amongst students of all colors, race, and cultural backgrounds, being recalled as being able to “float gracefully” between social groups in the school.”(Mundy 55) Her overall ability to relate to all students who went to her school not only positioned her strategically for her future but also set her up for her most destined position, being the First Lady of the United States of America. She was and is, also and most importantly, a voice when she chose to speak, an odd trait among women but presently is the overall admiration of a strong woman. Marian Robinson, Michelle's mother, made note that, “Michelle's always been very vocal about anything . . . If it's not right, she's going to say so,” (Mundy 56) a characteristic that has followed her to the White House adding to America a stronger sense of equality by on a public and national setting endorsing and promoting that women are a voice equal to men; fulfilling the principle that all men are created equal.
It is said that behind every great man there is a strong woman; with Barack Obama, Michelle Obama is the aid and fire as well as the strength behind Obama as it was designed but at it's peak of functionality. Mundy analyzes in her biography of Michelle, that “If Michelle was intense and driven, Barack soon emerged as more intense and more driven, at least when it came to making a mark in politics.” (Mundy 123) An intensity that has benefited America not only in the rigorous production since the inauguration of Obama, but most importantly the care of the American people, primarily the middle and lower classes, gradually dispersing the inequality of the more wealthier classes versus the lower classes. Michelle Obama's advocacy, that has followed her since her days at Princeton, where she involved herself in the Third World Center that supported minority kids and Harvard, where she participated in advocating the hiring of professors of minorities, for those less fortunate has been clearly visible in the days in office of the Obama administration with the proposal of a public option, and her visits to homeless shelters and soup kitchens in her first days of being the First Lady. This focus on those struggling has initiated a national discussion and look at how we treat those people who are less fortunate, sometimes showing a darker side of our democracy. Such as on a news report on MSNBC where a business man was seen throwing money at a man who could not walk at a healthcare protest. This concern for the less fortunate is many times misinterpreted for a communistic impulse on democracy.
The lasting legacy of Michelle Obama will probably be the example of what an African American woman is capable of and the deterioration of the 'Sista Gurl' stereotype that has clung to black women. She has also brought to the eye nationally, that black women are pretty and more importantly bringing a sense of pride to many African American women and more so African American young girls who are constantly faced everyday with the white skin and long hair as a sense of beauty. Bringing black women finally, as somewhat of the last people to acquire equality in the American culture. Presently she is also the representation of fashion as Mrs. Kennedy in her day and time was, and the representation of discipline as Barbara Bush was. Consequently as with every First Lady she is the female role model impacting America not only on its fashion but on American women and young girls and their conduct. Michelle Obama again is the discussion and the positive progress of America's long racial history, as Mundy perfectly puts it, “. . . her very presence at Obama's side as the descendant of slaves . . . [has raised] questions about how far we have come in our tolerance and how far we have to go . . . [her] journey will have a more lasting impact on our dreams of equality, our hopes and our audacity . . .” (Mundy 198)
Michelle Obama, the descendant of slaves, has caused the revisit of race and has moved America not only to reassess but to accept the principle on which the country was built. The first time you look upon a picture your eyes divert to a certain point and usually your memory remembers this first impression, an impression that will stick and will be inevitably hard to remove. Michelle Obama is the image of America in its purest form that when looked at resembles the principles of sovereignty, freedom, but most importantly equality by her skin tone and her gender that reside in the highest form of authority in the United States. She is the success of the struggles of men and women, and leaders and politicians, and slaves who have gone before her and carved out the path to the fulfillment of the words that were written in the Declaration of Independence, 'that all men are created equal.'
Something's Wrong (Excerpt from Book Destiny)
Sometimes I don't know why I go out. Like out to the clubs or to that party. I mean this isn't a new thing that's just started with D.J. No I used to do this sort of thing before. But not regularly of course. I hate what I see in the clubs or the house parties. Women bent over like dogs and men bouncing from one to the other. It's a little different now but not that much. Men instead of putting a ring on a woman's hand and committing to her, drunken her for that which should be saved for marriage. Others drug. Some women show off their bodies and act promiscuously to get a drink instead of pulling out their own cash. Some use the ugly lonely men standing or sitting off to themselves. Extremely vulnerable not only because of the lack of good looks that permits them to attract women, but they are fresh from a divorce and desperately seeking a rebound--more so comfort. Others who are shy and not much of the party, who if it were not for their friends would be home enjoying a quiet movie with popcorn and their lover, drink until they no longer restrain themselves and then become the life of the party. Both men and women, hunting around the club exchanging eyes and glances and smirks and smiles--like wolves in sheep's clothing, only interested in getting laid later on tonight. Not realizing that both parties are worth so much more than a one night stand. And the music that drowns the air along with the smoke, like an illusion--a mask but not really, hiding it's true face, but propaganding the sickness of this world. And the beat is so sweet that you don't realize it's poison.
I look at D.J. And he looks at me.
"I thought I was the only one."
I had a friend once who pointed all this out to me when I was apart of this sickness. A sickness so strong and so captivating it was like a blindness--worse total darkness that I took for my light. She called such things incorrectness. I recall once in a similar setting as this with her on my right and my friend Liz on my left, she said, " . . . And I ask again . . . What is this world coming to? So much incorrectness and so little time." I remember frowning at her through the dark of the party trying to read her expression--her, of which this craziness had come. But her face was as mine is now and D.J.'s is. Just a calm and humbled--concerned but just so face. I remember looking out into the sea of destruction disguised as pleasant waters, sweet to the tongue and gentle to the touch . . . Later that night it was still pleasant and gentle but after awhile it began to burn. Like being in the sun for to long my body began to scar with injuries that seemed unhealable. But my friend Liz, she grabbed my hand, "Come on girl. There ain't nothin wrong with this."
But there was something wrong. Two boys kissing on each other, girls dancing on each other, a humping party rather than a party, rather a sex party with clothes on. Boys smoking weed and girl's weave catching fire which was supposed to be funny, and boys fighting not realizing that they're brothers, you couldn't say that wasn't wrong. Of course you might come around and say it's not after painting over it so many times--thing is, no matter how much you sugar coded it--it was still there.
I look at D.J. And he looks at me.
"I thought I was the only one."
I had a friend once who pointed all this out to me when I was apart of this sickness. A sickness so strong and so captivating it was like a blindness--worse total darkness that I took for my light. She called such things incorrectness. I recall once in a similar setting as this with her on my right and my friend Liz on my left, she said, " . . . And I ask again . . . What is this world coming to? So much incorrectness and so little time." I remember frowning at her through the dark of the party trying to read her expression--her, of which this craziness had come. But her face was as mine is now and D.J.'s is. Just a calm and humbled--concerned but just so face. I remember looking out into the sea of destruction disguised as pleasant waters, sweet to the tongue and gentle to the touch . . . Later that night it was still pleasant and gentle but after awhile it began to burn. Like being in the sun for to long my body began to scar with injuries that seemed unhealable. But my friend Liz, she grabbed my hand, "Come on girl. There ain't nothin wrong with this."
But there was something wrong. Two boys kissing on each other, girls dancing on each other, a humping party rather than a party, rather a sex party with clothes on. Boys smoking weed and girl's weave catching fire which was supposed to be funny, and boys fighting not realizing that they're brothers, you couldn't say that wasn't wrong. Of course you might come around and say it's not after painting over it so many times--thing is, no matter how much you sugar coded it--it was still there.
Standing Against Authority
It is common in the depths of a man's soul and a man's being to have this urge to repeal authority no matter whether that authority be large or minor. But despite this instinct and the few that act on it, it is always in one's best interest to assimilate themselves under the established authorities in that favor may be gained and safety will have its umbrella of protection around the individual and his family. Such as Frazier Robinson, father of Michelle Obama, who in the late 1960s and early 1970s worked with the ‘Machine’ in Chicago, and by doing so enabled his family to not only attain a comfortable living arrangement but also enabled his children to receive a high level of education. There are those though, who we have come to admire and respect in history who have chosen to adhere to this instinct based on core beliefs to not conform to the headship and have succeeded, though not without hardships and struggles. Rarely is this the case; it unwise and calling upon adversity when you oppose authorities already in place.
Martin Luther King Jr. was bold, and as he was very active he was a very well-heard promoter of his stand for integration gaining the attention of those who had put in place a system in which social and racial relations were intended to follow. His skin which spoke more than his words along with his radical ideas gave him the podium for which he later was executed. He stood out in a way, unlike that of a man on a highway trying to stop traffic at the busiest time in the day, but stood out further in that he was so passionate and rigorous about which he was defending. The many speeches that he gave including these elements led to several historic riots as well as civil disobedience, such as the Bus Boycotts, furthering and strengthening his own display of civil disobedience; making him the target of which to stop the continuing of such behaviors. Integration is a key ingredient of not only our economy today but also the innovations of tomorrow, but that was not the idea of that era and instead stood in contradiction to ideas already standing and therefore he was executed.
Christianity is one of the most followed religions in the world today, but only due to the stand and sacrifice of the prophet Jesus, who through doing benevolent deeds was still exiled by his own religious authorities in terms of acceptance and was later executed. The actions and/or so called miracles, in the hope and idea to strengthen the society as a whole back-fired due to the rooted ideas of how society should run and these teachings could not be received even though presented humbly. No matter how much something might be beneficial to a person or one receiving something from another, if that person is so conformed to their way of doing things then they will not receive. Like the 2008 debate on healthcare in which many refused to even consider the idea of a public option which would have benefitted mass amounts of people providing healthcare to everyone. This refusal to consider the proposal of a public option is in its simplest form fear, and is the same fear that the Jewish authorities had when it came to the teachings of Jesus, and the same fear that any authority undergoes when challenged.
Even in appearing to disagree with the rules and regulations of a particular area can institute dangers to that sphere of safety and peace of mind, relaying to that fear in the authorities to maintain control at all times. Throughout history those who have appeared to be unshaken by authority and always carry a self-controlled mentality, have been the ones singled out and either alienated or executed. The best example of this is John Procter in The Crucible, who simply by his views, his intuition, and what was right, as well as primarily his reputation for being below the standard of an elect Puritan male in the community, was dragged into the confusion of the head authorities. And like the prophet Jesus, even in trying to aid the authorities was instead assumed as being aligned with the opposition and trying to deceive within the inside; another form of fear on the part of authorities and an element that led also to the destruction of the prophet Jesus.
Rarely is it that those who stand, for whatever belief it may be, right or wrong, go without some sort of persecution. History shows us that leaders and even ordinary people when going against a stronger or a higher authority than themselves face adversity. Despite if their ideas are beneficial for others, world changing, the most followed religion in the world, or just purely the reality not corrupted by illusions, they are susceptible to persecution and worse death. Ghandi, the Kennedy’s, Thomas Moore, Malcolm X, Monte Cristo . . . the list is endless. But it all goes back to the principle that if you put yourself on a pedestal you are susceptible to be shot down. It is better for a man who values his life to assimilate himself under the present authorities.
Martin Luther King Jr. was bold, and as he was very active he was a very well-heard promoter of his stand for integration gaining the attention of those who had put in place a system in which social and racial relations were intended to follow. His skin which spoke more than his words along with his radical ideas gave him the podium for which he later was executed. He stood out in a way, unlike that of a man on a highway trying to stop traffic at the busiest time in the day, but stood out further in that he was so passionate and rigorous about which he was defending. The many speeches that he gave including these elements led to several historic riots as well as civil disobedience, such as the Bus Boycotts, furthering and strengthening his own display of civil disobedience; making him the target of which to stop the continuing of such behaviors. Integration is a key ingredient of not only our economy today but also the innovations of tomorrow, but that was not the idea of that era and instead stood in contradiction to ideas already standing and therefore he was executed.
Christianity is one of the most followed religions in the world today, but only due to the stand and sacrifice of the prophet Jesus, who through doing benevolent deeds was still exiled by his own religious authorities in terms of acceptance and was later executed. The actions and/or so called miracles, in the hope and idea to strengthen the society as a whole back-fired due to the rooted ideas of how society should run and these teachings could not be received even though presented humbly. No matter how much something might be beneficial to a person or one receiving something from another, if that person is so conformed to their way of doing things then they will not receive. Like the 2008 debate on healthcare in which many refused to even consider the idea of a public option which would have benefitted mass amounts of people providing healthcare to everyone. This refusal to consider the proposal of a public option is in its simplest form fear, and is the same fear that the Jewish authorities had when it came to the teachings of Jesus, and the same fear that any authority undergoes when challenged.
Even in appearing to disagree with the rules and regulations of a particular area can institute dangers to that sphere of safety and peace of mind, relaying to that fear in the authorities to maintain control at all times. Throughout history those who have appeared to be unshaken by authority and always carry a self-controlled mentality, have been the ones singled out and either alienated or executed. The best example of this is John Procter in The Crucible, who simply by his views, his intuition, and what was right, as well as primarily his reputation for being below the standard of an elect Puritan male in the community, was dragged into the confusion of the head authorities. And like the prophet Jesus, even in trying to aid the authorities was instead assumed as being aligned with the opposition and trying to deceive within the inside; another form of fear on the part of authorities and an element that led also to the destruction of the prophet Jesus.
Rarely is it that those who stand, for whatever belief it may be, right or wrong, go without some sort of persecution. History shows us that leaders and even ordinary people when going against a stronger or a higher authority than themselves face adversity. Despite if their ideas are beneficial for others, world changing, the most followed religion in the world, or just purely the reality not corrupted by illusions, they are susceptible to persecution and worse death. Ghandi, the Kennedy’s, Thomas Moore, Malcolm X, Monte Cristo . . . the list is endless. But it all goes back to the principle that if you put yourself on a pedestal you are susceptible to be shot down. It is better for a man who values his life to assimilate himself under the present authorities.
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